Don't hold back

Last night was horrifying, I saw him walking away without even saying goodbye. He look at me in the eyes with those piercing stare and turn away. The smug on his face slowly disappear. I see myself trying to trace his steps. Trying to catch up with him. But it feels like something is pulling me back. Then I can no longer sense his presence. I saw a knife, and stab myself with it. The knife felt cold as I feel my blood gushing out. Then I can only see red, nothing else.

it was a suicidal dream

New Love

Ditto

Went shopping yesterday at Sunway. Bump onto Fir and his friends. Walk straight into Forever 21 and saw Leng with Emi. Saw Nik and have our squealing and hugging session for a few minutes. Bid farewell to Nik and went to buy her birthday present. Got back home around 7.

Since it's been a while since me and my siblings eat at William's, so we decided to have our dinner there. Ordered the regulars, the mouth-watering 'chicken premium' and my brother decided to have his spagetthi bolognaise. Not forgetting their Mango Special. AAAH I'm hungry again -.-

This week's buy :




Fuchsia woven top, Leopard knit top, RVCA inspired top ; FOREVER 21, Black and red t-shirt ; Dorothy Perkins

23/7/2009

Happy Birthday, budak kecik (:

I love you, Nik Anis

Snake

I feel down last night. So I called the savior, Shad. It's a good thing that he and Fareq is nearby so they came to see me. Since it's 3 am, I have to literally sneak out (it's easier now since my guard when back to Nepal) but end up hanging with them in front of the house. Told them everything and being the weakling I am, I cried. Shad kept saying 'It's not your fault' over and over again. While Fareq told me frequently : 'You didn't do anything wrong pun' Then he borrowed Shad's car to buy some tic tac to cheer me up.

They went back home around 4.30 because I want to sleep and to calm myself down. Bid farewell to them and slowly creeps in. Get inside my room and just lie on my bed. Truth be told, I am still sad.


I never want it to be this way.

The comeback

stfu bitch, you're giving me headaches.







okay now I feel like crying.

Christian Audigier

Nazam bought this t-shirt at Ed Hardy for me haha :-D But it costs RM436.00. I feel so fucking guilty -.- But he said that this t-shirt is for my birthday present since he'll be studying at Leeds for five years. So 1 present for 5 birthdays hihi

THANK YOU NAZAM !
my life is complete now, I can die peacefully haha

Anywaysss, the photoshoot just now was great. They're a bunch of funny people so yeah I do enjoy myself (: I'll update and upload more pictures soon. I'm tired heh -.-

Angst remedy

ROFL (!)

Dang it !

Just got back from going out with Fatnad. Fetch Luqeey at section 9 then went to BK. Hang around a bit, and Luqeey tells us about his girlfriend's (Anisss) gift to him for their anniversary. Okay sumpah sweet :-D You're lucky to have her, so take very good care of her tau ! (: After that Fatnad drove to section 12. I was in a very good mood but then a certain someone have to come and ruin it. Sheessh you're such a pain in the arse.

Okay I look weird but then my hair looks long so yeah haha :D Anyways I'm going to help Fatnad to take pictures of her classmates tomorrow. So expect a long busy day. I'll update more soon (:

(:

Yeaaaaay Shad have a blogspot now (!)
check him out okay (:

http://straying-thoughts.blogspot.com/

Drool

Move over, Fairlady Z and Skyline GTR (!) My new dream car, a simple Volvo C30 :-D

So comel haha I'm sure The queen won't approve this car because as you can see, it only has 2 door. But the king manage to get away in buying his Brabus Mercedes SLK haha :-D If I were to get this car, I want it to be like this :

Ice white exterior. With a Scotia 7" x 17" Alloy Wheels and Offblack seats with red interior. Aaaaa sumpah I want this car (!) But it's expensive. The price is really not worth it. But my mission in finding a soon-to-be-rich-ass-pilot-husband starts now ! So he can buy me this car haha

Breakfast

Pancakes with butter, mapple syrup and bananas.

FOOD IS GOOD

31/10/2008
This, I miss.

&

Okay finally dh dpt control my face, I don't look like I'm on drugs anymoreee (!) a bit lah kan actually haha

Went dinner with the family last Saturday night, have some business filled conversation with the king. Yes, business. I need to start looking for a way to keep the money rolling all year around. I do believe that I have an interesting affair with money. Based on that, I know that the king's blood runs through my veins. He spend most of his money on cars and we also have something else in common, we love to splurge on clothes. Haha :-D

The king is a shopaholic (!) He shops more than I do, I feel like stealing his shoes and sell them. Then I'll use the money to shop at Ed Hardy ehehehehe .. Okay dah snap out of it.

I have been chatting with this one guy. And after a few week, I find out that he is actually my brother's friend from the olden days. I used to have a crush on Aqmar, his little brother HAHA :-D Nazam, if you're reading this, hiiiiii !

I have addmaths class tomorrow. You can always, I repeat, always see this guy sleeping at least once a day in class.

Woi bangun laaa, spm ! haha

I'm sorry

It all happened so quickly, I saw Jun running towards the streets to play with my sister. The next few seconds, my sister started to scream 'Jun gets hit by a car !' My heart stops beating. I was shaking, and I ran upstairs to call the queen. She was shocked, I feel so suffocate. I didn't want to see Jun's body as I hid in the kitchen. I feel my eyes watering and at the same time I hear my sister crying her heart out.

The queen was trying to appear strong in front of us, she didn't cry even though I know she loves Jun dearly. The queen rushed to see Jun and she said that Jun's body is still in a good condition, it's just that blood is oozing out of her mouth. But she is already dead. Two guys in the car who ran over Jun offered to bury her in front of my house. I can see it in their face that they're guilty as ever.

After she was buried, I stepped outside. Those two guys apologized to me. A part of me wanted to just shout 'can't you drive properly ?!' but another part of me says 'you know what ? it happened, there's nothing I can do' I smiled at them and said 'it's okay'.

After they left, I walk slowly to where they ran over Jun. Blood is everywhere, I choked. She is just a kitten, the way she died is simply heart-breaking. I regret the moment where I ignored her, when she wanted to play around with me. I will miss how she would look at me with her big, bright yellow cat eyes.

I'm sorry for everything, Jun. I love you ;-(

1 year and still going strong

Happy Anniversary, Nad and Nas ! I'll pray that you guys last long, until you guys get married and have childrens and grandchildrens and such :-)

Team Nad and Nas all the way (!)

2

&

Christian Dior, FALL COUTURE 2009

Love the design, hate the background.

1

Yves Saint Laurent, RESORT 2010

The Fall Couture 2009 is up (!)

The wind blows

GO

GO D*STARZ !

Good luck, Anis and Deeya, do your best okay, I'll be rooting for you two ! :-D

Who Knew ?

Guess what, almost the whole gang is going to PLKN. Me, Ili, Awateef, Nik, Sira, Faris, Faza and that guy. It was fun at school today despite the fact that Ili and Awateef is absent :-( Like in maths, Winifred sat at the teacher's chair and started to ignore the class. So some of us took the chance to walk around, especially Syamiel. He went to talk to Asyraf behind me. Then Winifred notice that everyone is like forgetting the fact that she is still there.

So she said out loud as she look at Syamiel ; 'If nak bagus math, lps cikgu mengajar tu kena terus buat latihan.' Syameil look at her and just replied 'Oh.' Then he kept on talking to Asyraf haha :-)

Then on recess, Chip showed us a video of this one form 4 girl shuffling. They all said that she's a new student from Perlis. Me, Aidil, Awaina and Faris laughs a lot while we're watching the video. Since Naeim said that seeing that girl shuffling in real life is absolute humor, we decided to call her and ask whether she don't mind showing her move to us.

Faris have a better idea, he wanted to challenge her in shuffle HAHA but I'm not sure whether he's serious or not. I think he's not. Chip warned us to not laugh at her face or she'll stop shuffling. So when she walk our way, I hug Didiy, look at the opposite way and laugh my heart out. That girl said that they'll be facing each other next to her class.

So we all went upstairs (including Didiy) to watch the so-called battle just for laughs. But then something came up so I have to get back to class. So I missed it (!) Around 12.35, I saw Aidil on our way downstairs, she shows a glimpse of the shuffling-battle video. Again, I was laughing my ass off.

I decided to go to the Library to finish my Add math folio which I only manage to do the introduction part because I decided to follow Fatnad to hang with the guys. So we drove to section 8, met the guys and all 7 of us squished inside Fatnad's car to get to 12. At first our plan was to hang around Bukit 12. But then we thought it'll be a great idea in going to one of those incomplete-scary-looking-fucking-huge bungalows.

Took a few pictures and Fatnad send me around 6 because she's late for her tuition class with Shima which started at 5.30. Ah, I'm tired (!)

Realize

I 'EFFIN GOT PLKN (!) HAHAHA

I'm not going anyways due to this skin problem. So at least there's a good thing about eczema ; being able to avoid 3 months of full throttle torture.

I think that something's wrong with my left eye. At first it becomes all itchy. Now it hurts whenever I touch it. *groans

Planning for a trip to Sunway, wanted to catch things up with Forever 21's collection. Need to save some money by then.